Those who preside at meetings try to get others around the table to give their inputs when asked. It irritates the chair no end when there’s talking among participants themselves, paying no attention to the slide presentation.
Bored attendees amuse themselves by sending and receiving text messages, quietly laughing at something on their phone screens, and occasionally offering offline commentaries to seat mates on either side. Such comments are often tetchy, and not meant to be overheard, certainly not by the subject of the rude review: note how he says “actually” before every phrase.
Talking on the side is unrelated to the agenda. Still, such remarks even when causing a distraction to the proceedings are not always ignored by the speaker. (Can we just have one conversation, please.) Calling attention to inattentiveness, except inside a classroom, still makes the ill-mannered commentator pugnacious: Why? Is your presentation worth listening to?
The side comment however is enshrined in literature. This digression is enclosed in parenthesis and beloved by particular authors of classics, even defining their writing styles. Victor Hugo in his novel, Les Miserables, devotes fifty pages to the battle of Waterloo as a way of introducing his scheming innkeeper, Thernadiere. This villain is depicted as a despicable grave robber rifling through the possessions of fallen soldiers in that war.
The open and close parentheses are paired to provide an enclosure for a phrase or clarificatory note to support or divert from a main thought in a sentence. It is the ultimate talking on the side. The etymology of “parenthesis” gives a clue to its function. In Greek, the original word means to “insert.” This active verb also associated with an intimate act is the literary device referred to as the parenthetical remark.
In the legislative sphere, insertion is a budgetary process, as when extracting Christmas bonuses from savings in government-controlled agencies. The parenthesis also embraces numbers that denote a deficit — a financial case of inattention.
In theater, the side comment allows a character to talk to the audience directly. This theatrical convention is denoted as a “stage whisper” to signify that it is intended for ears other than the accompanying characters on stage. Thus, a conniving Iago may be reciting whole stanzas of evil intent meant for the audience but mere thought balloons as far as the intended victim, standing just beside the schemer, is concerned.
This asymmetry of perception between the audience and the characters on stage is a form of irony. This same seduction of the viewer as participant is employed by Alfred Hitchcock in his movies where the audience sees a man about to plunge a knife on his unwary target who is seen through the curtain, quietly having a shower just before she is killed. The music of screeching violins accompanying the stabs makes the scene all the more hair-raising.
The grapevine in the company is provides the most common form of talking on the side. Coffee servers who listen to conversations while setting down cups subsequently give their narrative of what went on, before somebody asked for a sachet of artificial sugar. Woe to the corporate politician who ignores those listening on the side to words not reflected in the minutes of the meeting.
Small talk as appetizer for a serious discussion is also a form of inattentive chatter in the corporate world.
Just before the debate on downsizing, there is chitchat about the stock market run-up and the subsequent correction and how much a known associate has lost using margins and going for naked shorts. (The latter topic has nothing to do with lewd behavior.) Other topics intrude and set the mood for the main agenda to follow.
Peripheral conversations and parenthetical remarks enrich rather than distract from the topic at hand. The speaker who digresses from his prepared speech to make a candid observation on the issues of the day can be a lot more interesting to listen to. But then this type can also ramble on too long.
Meandering away from a topic is a different category of side comments. It can be the musings of someone too out of touch, and soon no longer within hearing distance… and eventually no longer listened to.
A. R. Samson is chair and CEO of Touch DDB.
